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Technology is making communication easier in today’s world, but at the expense of personal contact as many people choose to work at home in front of a computer screen. What dangers are there for a society which depends on computer screens rather than face-to-face contact for its main means of communication?
In this day and age, no one can deny that technology has made human’s communication easier.
However, many people are of the opinion that spending time on computer screens rather than face-to-face contact poses dangers for society. Therefore, this essay will examine the dangers that probably impact on society at present day.
Firstly, it is true that when people select to work at home by doing their job on the computer, their
interaction with their colleagues in society will decline in importance. This change results in becoming shallow and introverted among these individuals because greeting conversations by typed on screen can not convey emotions and feelings, touchings to another side while face-to-face meetings can. A case that illustrates this is if you want to confide in your best friend when you desperately need a shoulder to cry on, you can not express it by posting messages via computer. Thus, [they better take indirect way conversation ß this sentence does not follow.
Furthermore, the most important threat to society by lacking participation in communication is that it hurts creativity in humanity. It is inevitable that [humanity is a social animal, so ß don’t say this] people have to socialise with others surrounding them. Clearly, the communication skills play important roles in our species. If humans detract from this communication skills which should continuously be developed, one could rarely progress in art, science, technology, innovation and so on. I believe this is likely the result from the fact that those innovations rely much on team work combining a variety of skills among people. On the other hand, working on screen alone at home destroys all chance to construct these developments in society.
All in all, I personally agree that the obsession in spending time on greeting people on the computer screen is dangerous for society in two perspectives, namely being shallow and lonely in individuals, and lacking of continuous development of communication skills which play a significant role in the creativity of humanity.
Estimate IELTS Band: 6.0
IELTS Examiner Comments: This essay does have a few excellent parts (end of second body par.) but I feel it sounds too formal and repeats a lot of vocabulary. Although it is worthy of band 6, it would need more specific descriptive vocab and examples for it to receive a higher score. Go over the correction and write more from your personal experience in life regarding this topic. Good luck!