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Some authors believe that urbanization is a “modern Disease”. In no less than 250 words explain if you agree with this view and give your own opinion
Some people are satisfied to live in a developing city, as there are several high-technologies to support their lifestyle such as the skytrain, department stores, internet networks and many others. In contrast, nowadays there is a dramatic rise in the number of patients in a big city and the number will increase continually. This situation is occurred by technology and some people call “a modern disease”. Thus, is technology really good for people? This essay will elaborate the word “modern disease” and provide my opinions.
In my view, I divide the main point of modern disease into two points which are health and human mental. Firstly, health is affected by air pollution in town. There are several factors why air pollution in urban areas is heavier than in rural areas. For example, carbon dioxide is one factor to make people get cancer and almost all machines developed by technology will produce this gas in their process, such as smoke from exhaust pipes. Yet this problem will not be a big problem if there is a huge green area which is occupied by trees. Notwithstanding, most green areas in a city is developed by investors undear. Although the government issues laws to protect green areas, it is not enough if compared with the volume of air pollution in cities.
In addition, it is not only health of people that is affected by technology. One’s mental state is another thing which is affected too. The routine of people in big cities is always rushed; everyone has to hurry since they wake up in the morning to avoid being in terrible traffic in cities. This is a reason why citizens are pressured by stress which destroys their happiness every day.
Consequently, technology in the developing city is the reason for diseases among citizens, and they cannot avoid them if they still stay in the city.
ESTIMATE IELTS BAND : 5.0
IELTS Examiner’s Comment:
Although this essay is far better than the “tech vs. culture” essay because there are fewer errors (plural nouns, articles, prepositions, etc.), you are off topic, actually. The modern disease is not a disease in people, but it’s a disease to the environment and to our earth. Thus, your answer is not on the topic (you would actually get 4.5 maximum). However, just judging your writing is worthy of a band of 5.0. Keep working hard and good luck.