กลับมาพบกับเฉลยของงานเขียนเกี่ยวกับ Air Travel ในคราวที่แล้วกันนะคะ ใครที่ยังไม่ได้ลองทำพี่แนะนำให้ตามไปดูได้ที่ Link ด้านล่างเลยค่ะ
Air travel uses enormous amounts of the world’s limited supplies of fuel while creating very harmful pollution. Some people therefore say that travel by airplane should be limited to people going on business trips. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
In the past, months were needed to travel across the world, but now, aeroplanes have made it possible to orbit circumnavigate around under just a day, given giving a great convenience for everyone. Though, sSome have argued that the flying industry is the undermining cause of pollution and is over-consuming the insufficient fuels that all is are trying to reserve cut down on, and suggested that an air travelling should be restricted only for business purposes. There are many causes of high level of pollution and other feasible solutions to this problem, which will be discussed in this essay.
Aeroplanes cannot be solely blamed for creating noxious waste. It is only accountable for a small proportion, whereas the main major causes are the manufacturing industries and cars that deplete the fuel and produce a tremendous amount of pollution. Thus, it would be a wiser choice to have the government imposinge a strict measurement measures on the factories and cars to control the harmful gas emission and further promote the use of non-renewable resource, such as wind turbines.
Moreover, aeroplanes, especially the low-cost airlines have sparked the a boom in tourism thathas greatly enhanced the world’s economy during the past decades. Not only that does it brings in the money from the visitors, but it also bloomed up more businesses involving in tourism. Consequently, the economy does not only rely on trading, but tourism is also a crucial form of business that and one cannot overlook its power in the world’s economy. Therefore, is it worth to prohibit visitors from flying abroad for a holiday?
It is absolutely certain that pollution is currently a critical issue that everyone must act on. Though, iIn my opinion, there are other alternatives, such as passing a strict regulations on waste emissions, as a vast amount of money can be lost from the tourism industry if flying is restricted for only business purposes.
Estimate IELTS Band Score : 6.0
IELTS Examiner’s Comments: On the whole, this is quite a solid essay but there are way too many grammar errors as is evident. I’m not sure the purpose of your use of ‘though’ as a transition but I’d refrain from using it as it is incorrect. You must add examples to your essay to support your views and add more tenses.