กลับมาพบกันกับเฉลยงานเขียนตอนที่แล้ว ลองตามไปดูที่ LINK ด้านล่างกันเลยนะคะ
There are proponents of the belief that the government should fund youngsters for their primary education whereas others believe it should be paid by the family. This essay will examine the argument of both sides.
Some people are convinced that governments should spend a considerable budget allocation on the infrastructural development for the reason that the infrastructure is important to the direct well-being of its citizens as it makes people’s lives more convenient. For instance, the access of roads saves travelling time for the working man to go to his work place. Access to schools is no different.
However, it is the government’s responsibility to improve our life quality and education is one of the factors that brings about improvement in living. This is because it provides students the literacy skills, and experiences which opens their minds in many aspects all the while giving them employment opportunities. For instance, children who attend primary school are taught to read and write which are the skills that most employees require. Considering this, the payment of fundamental education should be the government’s expenditure.
Furthermore, every young person who is the future of country, should have the chance to study whether they are rich or poor. Hence, the government should give their parents a hand with the educational expense. To illustrate, if low-income families cannot afford tuition for their children’s courses, the youths will not have a chance to attend or finish their studies resulting in the drop of the country’s development.
To sum up, even though there are many avenues in how the government should divide their budget, I firmly believe that the government should pay for the primary education for young residents.
Estimate IELTS Band Score 5.5
IELTS Examiner’s Comments:
Your essay needs more ideas and development of ideas (ie. cause/effect and examples) to be worthy of a higher score. You need to also review some grammar because your errors are very diverse (tense, articles, preposition, infinitives, plurals nouns, etc.) You are on the right track for a better grade, should you write more and try to cut down on silly little mistakes. Good luck and keep trying!