มาพบกับเฉลยและคำแนะนำงานเขียนเกี่ยวกับการพัฒนาของเทคโนโลยีส่งผลอย่างไรกับการเปลี่ยนไปของวัฒนธรรมจากงานเขียนตอนที่แล้วของนักเรียน IELTS ของสถาบัน ไปดูตัวอย่างได้จาก link ด้านล่างเลยค่ะ
Many people believe that the development of technologies changes their lifestyle and also removes some customs. However, others feel that this these developments can go along be applied in harmony with conventional behavior. From my perspective, advancements don’t affect a traditional way of life.
There are several advantages of technology to maintaining preserve conventional culture. The internet is used as a search engine to find and share information such as codes of conduct, festival ceremonies, customs and social behavior around the world. It is also convenient to both download and upload photography and video which can make people more gain a greater understanding of every culture.
Modern technology makes our world become smaller. As a consequence, worldwide situations like national ceremonies is are shown on in real time over the world. The Miss World competition is one of the most examples that indicates that technology and culture are able to occur together embrace each other without conflict. Each woman wears modern styles of national costumes and play performs a talent show that relates to their culture. This is broadcasted to worldwide people.
Technological developments upgrade people’s life lives rather than take worthily downgrades them. Cultures to an end will always survive. If everyone tries to preserve their cultures, it they will not be lost. For instance, Thai society encourages younger people respecting to to respect older people. In addition, Thailand is known as the land of Smiles as Thais that they smile generally. Therefore (why?), parents are play an important factors role in order to teach their children about conventional culture, generation by generation.
In conclusion, the development of technology can go with exist next to traditional ways of behavior. Moreover, the Internet and telecommunication are used as tools to distribute local cultures to people around the world.
Estimate IELTS Band Score: 5.5
IELTS Examiner Comments: there are various grammar mistakes but the main one that sticks out is your plural vs. singular noun (and subsequent verb-subject agreement).A few linking logic errors are there as well. Yes, organization is there and overall, your essay has a good basic form. How about comparing life in the past and life today in terms of cultural traditions. (Can include past tenses)?